Thursday, July 10, 2008

Huggies and Tree Huggers

I really really can't stand when famous people pretend to be deep thinkers. I took the kids to the dentist this morning for their six month cleanings, and while waiting, I perused Good Housekeeping. Lo and behold, I came across this little gem:

By Sheryl Crow, mom of Wyatt, Age 1
GoodHousekeeping, July 2008

"When my son was three months old, I took him to the zoo. ( I didn't even know you had a baby?) At the polar bear exhibit, (Polar bears at the zoo? Yeah, I checked it out.) Wyatt's face lit up when he saw the polar bear. (Sheryl, honey, that was gas. Three month old babies barely light up at the sight of Mommy let alone an 8 foot beast.) It was amazing for me to watch them connect-these living beings who share a planet. (Oh they were connecting allright. Your son was looking like an appetizer off the TGI Friday's menu.) But I also felt panic and overwhelming sadness knowing the impact our environment is having on polar bears and on us. (Panic really? You better not go see WALL-E then. That will really make you panic when you see what earth's gonna look like in 600 years)

Yet I see something very hopeful in kids-the birth of new activists.
(Are you saying your three month old is an activist? Hahahahahehhehheee) Kids don't just feel helplessness and panic but a sense of injustice, too. (Name one kid you know who is panicking about the earth turning into heap o trash. I'll name two who panic only when I threaten to get rid of the TV.) I sometimes think the thing that keeps adults from acting is cynicism, a belief that we can't really change things. (Oh you haven't heard? I don't need to worry about fixing anything. Obama and McCain have vowed to fix it all.) Kids aren't like that. They're awake to what's around them, so they can actually do something about it. (Do you really believe what you're saying?) We teach our kids all these ideals: Let's leave the Earth a better place than we found it. Kids are motivated not just by what's in their heads but by what they actually see, like a baby polar bear. (Psst. Sheryl, with the exception of the San Diego Zoo, the likelihood of ANY child seeing a polar bear that usually lives in, I don't know, the North Pole, is as likely as Lance Armstrong dating one of the Olsen twins. ) They can be the ones to motivate us, their parents to change. (No they won't. Because that will mean no more plastic toys in their Happy Meal.)



I'll bet she uses disposable diapers.




post signature

54 Comments:

Emily said...

Love this.

Why are celebs so dumb?

Lauren W said...

WHAT?! You mean Sheryl Crow's son is a NORMAL LITTLE BOY? You mean just because her face is recognizable to more people than mine is that she isn't somehow endowed with a great mystic wisdom?
Man... there goes that theory...
Meanwhile, I'm glad that I'm not the only one who responds to interviews by making comments in my head as I go along :)

Hot Tub Lizzy said...

I don't trust any group of people that name their children after drinks (cocoa) or food (apple)...

Karen said...

So funny :-)

It always makes me laugh when they go on about how hard motherhood is, with their nanny, personal assistant and bodyguards standing in the background....

Lula! said...

Debbie my dear...my BFF...my Fairy Blogmother...

This is CLASSIC. GENIUS. SPOT-ON. BRILLIANT.

And it's why I love you.

Well said...even if it was all in your head. I hope Sheryl reads it.

Swirl Girl said...

He probably didn't light up at the polar bear itself, maybe there was a shiny thing or a piece of bird turd dangling from the frickin' cage at the zoo.

the only reason celebrities rage on about all this is because their full charge nannies have the day off - and they have to do something while the kids' awake,

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

LOL..someone's trying too hard...

Suzanne said...

WOW, an editor really published that pablum. Yikes. Well at least I haven't seen her jumping all over couches.

- Suzanne

Suzanne said...

WOW, an editor really published that pablum. Yikes. Well at least I haven't seen her jumping all over couches.

- Suzanne

Rene said...

Debbie -- OMG! You are killing me here!! That is the type of dialogue that runs through my head all the time! Glad I'm not alone!

Midwest Mommy said...

I love this! Too funny. Seriously 3 months old connecting wiht a polar bear! HA! I am sure the many of nannies were actually the ones who took the kid to the zoo.

RJN said...

I am not sure what is scarier about Sheryl Crow's article:
a) that anyone would actually write this blather
b) that anyone thinks it is actually cohernet, much less critical, thinking
c) the magazine thinks we are so dumb to find this compelling.

At least it made me feel smart for a day :-)

The Man

Gina said...

BWAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!
Pretty people should not open thier mouths. Ever.
Not regular smart people that also happen to be pretty. Just the ones stupid enough to make it big in pop culture.

Amy said...

I don't get celebrities at all. The do need to keep their opinions to themselves :)

Kimba said...

Snort! You make me laugh out loud!

And I couldn't agree more. I'm always telling my hubby that just because someone is a celebrity doesn't mean they are smart or have something to add to the discussion.

This kind of stuff makes be bonkers! Bonkers, I say! The last time I checked, the earth was our environment too.

I won't drag out my soapbox now because I'm hungry and I want some chips.

Oh - our zoo as polar bears too.

amanda said...

LOL! This cracks me up! It's just like how I go on a rant for at LEAST a half hour after seeing the ANNOYING - UNREALISTIC - TRYING TO MAKE ALL OTHER WOMEN NOT FEEL WORTHY... *breath, breath* commercial that Kelly Ripa has out for Electrolux. I know they're trying to make it spoof that it's all a myth... but really, if you watch her show... she implies that she does do it all. I just want to kill her skinny little tush. (Joking... this is not a public threat on the life of Kelly Ripa! I'm just green with envy.*evil grin*)

Mamasphere said...

Wouldn't it be funny if her son grew up and didn't give a hoot about the environment? Like, making national news for littering at the Grand Canyon, or getting caught tagging with toxic spraypaint.

Trish said...

Amen sister.

You are so funny.......
but I will tell you that we have Polar Bears here in the Oregon Zoo.

Shannon said...

I love that you can call out the celebs. I am shocked that your children didn't have a social identities at 3 months. (JK) I love reading your insites. You write out what I wish I could.

Steph said...

that was amazingly funny!!

Kat said...

You are absolutely hilarious. I love your thoughts. And I cannot wait for American Idol to start again so that I can get the Debbie version :-)

3 month old "connecting" with a Polar bear...uh, huh...

Jaci said...

Why did she take a 3 month old to the zoo? They sleep every 20 minutes...so, what was the point?

She makes her nanny use cloth diapers, and she makes her cleaning staff scrub them with organic chemical-free poop remover. Sometimes she actually touches her son, but not often. :)

Bobbi said...

LOL!!!! I read your post to my hubby while we were waiting on supper to cook - I had to stop because I almost peed myself! Priceless!

Piggy said...

diffusion of responsibility n. A reduced sense of personal responsibility and individual accountability experienced in certain circumstances by members of a group, often leading to behaviour untypical of any of the group members when alone. See bystander effect, deindividuation, social loafing.

http://www.encyclopedia.com/doc/1O87-socialloafing.html

Kat said...

I'm not sure if I understood what piggy said?

Anyway, I'll never look at Sheryl Crow in the same way. That was really pitiful.

Hot Tub Lizzy said...

Oh - and just fyi - we have polar bears at the zoo in Minnesota... but really.. that's not so much of a stretch....

Mom Taxi Julie said...

clap clap clap!! That was too funny!

HeathahLee said...

Oh, my, you make me laugh out loud, Debbie! That's almost as nonsensical as when Paris Hilton says anything.

And we have a really great Polar Bear habitat, exhibit, whatever here at the Memphis Zoo. We better...they just spend a gajillion dollars renovating it. But as coolio as it is, I still don't think a 3-month old would pay much attention to it.

Cookie said...

Hello! Thanks for the visit! I'm the Cookie from Gina's and yes I do know the "other" Cookie too! lol! She's great! Too funny though...Glad you found me.

Jennifer P. said...

Just sing Cheryl, don't talk, just sing....

Do they ever learn?!

Sarah Mae said...

So silly...

Heather said...

This is TOO GOOD!! You are cracking me up. I love it when VH1 does their special on the stupid things famous people say. Tom Cruise is my all time favorite. That man needs to just concentrate on looking pretty.

Sniz said...

I think you and all your commentors (commenters?) said it all, Debbie. Classic. Just classic. Thanks for the laugh. It's all the funnier because it's so ridiculous...celebrities are SOOO out of touch with reality. She wasn't thinking about anything besides saying the things she thinks will impress her other out-of-touch friends in Celebrity-ville. I don't think they think things through...they just say what is popular at the time. Do I sound cynical? A baby who can barely focus on a person's face, let alone a blurry blob of white in the distance, a baby who can't speak or even think with words, being concerned about the environment? And the people who are supposed to swallow that are supposed to be smart? Oh my goodness.

Melissa Lester said...

Hee-hee! I'm laughing, thinking of my 2-year-olds antics. Once Cheryl's son is mobile and messy, she may realize that moms giggled at what she said.

Lee Ann said...

I happened across this article as well...probably in a dr office. Amen sister. Our thoughts about the whole thing are in line! Although......I doubt she uses disposable diapers :-) She's very green. But then, when you have a nanny to wash them, or buy the really expensive flushable ones, what's the big deal?

Rhea said...

ROFL Who takes a three month old to the zoo? I mean, if you have older children and bring along a baby, yes, I understand, but just a 3 month old? They aren't really looking at things?!! sheesh.

I loved your comments on this article!! Hilarious!

Sidney said...

Too funny! I think a better article would be a real mom taking six kids to the grocery store before dinnertime....talk about kids feeling a sense of injustice...."NO, you cannot have that candy bar/soda/Monster..."

Now THAT's real life....

Connie said...

You crack me up, Debbie! I'm right there with you! Cheryl Crow is the one who was calling for everyone to only use one square of toilet paper per use to save the Planet. Love her music but what a whack!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/6583067.stm

Strawberry Blonde said...

Cracking. Me. UP!

My favorite is when celebs talk about how we, as Americans, really need to be more proactive in helping world poverty. Then, they accept their $12 million dollar pay check after their movie. Do they realize what they could do with that $12 million paycheck? THEY COULD END WORLD POVERTY!

Such dummies.

Sissy said...

You are hilarious and probably right! I bet she isn't washing out those cloth diapers...I bet she reaches for the pampers.

Missy said...

Oh, Sheryl... you're so pretty... *pats on the head*

The Roost'er said...

Aligned in thought, yes in deedy.

Oh, and St. Louis has a very nice polar bear exhibit, too. You guys have pandas, right? Not us, fair friend. Even when it's about 100 degrees and equitable humidity, we have polar bears.

Michelle said...

*snicker* *snicker* *snort*

I saw the same series of thoughts by celebrities when I was getting a manicure recently and let's just say that you read far further into this than I could.

Gramma 2 Many said...

Was it not SC who said we should use only one square of Toilet Paper? I thought that one was a classic.
Gina, I am glad you qualified your comment. For a minute I thought I would never be able to hear your lovely voice again and experience your wit.
BTW what is she doing at a zoo anyway. I thought the big enviornmentalists thought they were totaly wrong. After all is that not exploiting the poor Polar Bear and taking him from his natural habitat?
GIVE ME A BREAK11

Carolina Mama said...

Hilariously true. Love your blog and seeing DC again. We were Reston residents for a while - love Virginia.

Life With My 3 Boybarians said...

Bwwwaaaha hahaaaa. *snort*

Caroline said...

So the zoo at three months? Next thing you know he'll be on the GreenPeace dingy setting out to have a sit-in on a oil rig. And he'll only be two years old. Sheryl, you might have more luck teaching him about Who created the world and His grand plan to save us.

Kelly said...

Too funny, yeh she uses the disposable diapers and the plastic platex liners for the bottles.....
I mean the kid is what 3 months??? and yeh when in the world did she have a kid???? Maybe that was her way of telling everyone.....
You are a genius Deb!

Love ya!
Kelly

Karin @ 6ByHisDesign said...

OK, I had to come back to this one. I don't know if you check back over 'old post' comments.

But. Are you ready for this? Tonite on the news I heard that we must all switch to CFL bulbs by 2014. Seriously?! Sheryl, are you behind this?

And can I share with you how you can't sweep up a broken CFL bulb with a broom or a vacuum b/c you will contaminate it with Mercury? Didn't my mom tell me once that that stuff in the old thermometer was dangerous if I broke it. Accidentally. While heating it up on the toaster. So I could stay home from school...(No, I didn't really do that. Not really...)

OK. Perhaps not the forum for my own issues, but I hoped you would understand my fuming.

I'm all for saving on my electric bill. But I think I can make my own lighting decisions.

*sigh*

Perhaps I should just hit delete...

Oh. And just so's ya know. Sheryl Crow adopted her baby. I'm so 'with it' that I know that.

Tiffany said...

This is so funny. Like when Susan Serandon threatens to leave the US if McCain wins... good riddance sister.

Connecting? Please. That bear would eat your baby in a second.

Mama Dawg said...

Oh, my, that was funny. And so true.

Z's Mom said...

HAHAHAHA.....I love your commentary!

Megan B said...

I love that you have turned this into a creative writing outlet. I get such a kick out of your posts. I used to think I was a good writer until I stumbled on your site!!! You're fab! Keep me laughing, k?

Britt said...

I'm so tired of all these people trying desperately to get my kids to convince me to change.

I hope to raise my girls to know better than to come to me and say (when they are older and can speak in coherent sentences, of course) "Mom you know that paper plate means that fifteen trees were cut down in the rainforest, right?" Or turns off the tv in the middle of my video game and says "Mom!! Your killing the ozone!"

Because as their parent, I get to make the choices. I get to do the research, make the rules, do the work. I carry the burden of my decisions and their outcomes. The weight of their existence has been laid in my hands .. and no five year old is going to come spouting off to me about how the things I do are ruining the future for her/him. Let the politicians fight over our ozone .. I'll do my small part here, but frankly with a 2 year old and a 1 year old I have more pressing matters at hand. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure I could solve the problems of our world (sarcasm) but honestly I don't have time to give interviews .. I'm a mom, for crying out loud!