Pretenders bug me.
Pretentious people bug me even more.
But, people who pretend to be pretentious just make me laugh.
So I'm at the optometrist having Little Red Riding Hood's eyes examined, and the I'm-not-an-optometrist-but-I-want-to-be-one-someday lady who helped LRRH pick out glasses admires my purse, squealing (seriously squealing):
"OOOHHHH, I love your purse, is that Dolce & Gabbana????"
To which I reply in my library voice, "No, it's Ebay."
Deflated and indigant, her reply was, "OH. I don't do Ebay."
To which I reply, "Oh honey, that's too bad. Because you just thought my $25 purse was the $395 one from Dooney & Bourke not Dolce & Gabbana.
Well, I didn't really say that. I bit my tongue, smiled, and said nothing.
It was best that way.
But believe me I thought it.
Because, if you're gonna pretend to be prententious, at least get your designers straight.